The NC State Fair - a study in eating habits

God love the State Fair. Ahhhhh, the time of the year when the word "diet" doesn't exist and bulimics rejoice. The time of the year when the deep fryer has an innate ability to link all socio-economic groups together in a common lard-based bond. Time to whip out your finest XXXXXXL t-shirt sporting "Born to be Wide" and wear it with pride. It is amazing what can go into the deep fryer these days. It's worth exploring because apparently state fair workers believe if they are stranded on a deserted island, they'd require a couple items: Deep fryer, oil, powdered sugar and a paper plate. That's just about the starting point for all of the following delicacies:

Fried Coca-Cola:
seriously, frying your drink? In Atlanta you get shot for them fightin' words. That's probably why they haven't done a deep fried Dr. Pepper. They'd open a fresh can of whup ass on you in Texas.

Fried peanut butter and jelly:
just about stuck my tongue to the roof of my mouth like tar on the back of a heel. If it weren't for the emergency bottle of water nearby my tongue would have blocked all air from my peanut butter laden mouth. Jelly, what the hell? carmelized into nothing.

Fried twinkie:
one word-fuckinyummyandithinkimhighasafrigginkitefromtheimmediatesugarhigh

Fried Wisconsin cheddar:
still dreaming of that stringing orange taste, especially when dipped into a tasty jalapeno hot treat. yowza

Fried pickles, green tomatoes, cheesecake and candybars....will have to wait until next year's food adventure. Don't get me started on the rides though.....they probably wouldn't let me in the Optimist Club for saying this, but do you really trust getting spun in quadruple circles in 5 different directions by a machine that is rolled in, parked, plugged into an electrical outlet and controlled by a big guy with shifty eyes grumbling "let 'er rip"?

Man I love living in the South. Good clean, greasy fun. 'Njoyed it y'all

Dated: October 22, 2007